Okay, so as it so happens, keeping every little Pokebeast out of their containers for copious amounts of time leads to severe consequences and I blame John in its entirety. He can share it with Eridan, who is truly a fucking accomplice in this, I have no goddamn doubt.

What I mean to say is, I have a plethora of various eggs because the things apparently can't be left to their own vices for five fucking minutes without proceeding to have some giant grubtarded pail party. We've got some Sneasel, Growlithe, Poochyena, and Squirtle eggs up for fucking grabs and, knowing my universal shitty luck, it will happen again sooner or later.

They're free, in case anyone was wondering "Oh Karkat, these have some great fucking stats, how much?" I'm being generous, considering that some of you decided to grant mercy to me at the start of this nookbiting venture. Shit, how does that phrase go... Right. "Passing it on," I figured, would be acceptable.

Don't all get in line at fucking once now.

[ this would be the Gear clicking on. pure audio, but the distinct press of buttons with clear sounds of irritation ( grunting, muttered curses ) can be heard over the feed. ]

The fuck does this shit even work...

[And then there’s the distinct sound of someone else, a haughty HUFF before:]

Who the fuck cares, Kar? Let’s just get goin’ already, I hardly want to wait around while you futz with that infernal dewice.

[ hear that? it’s an irritable sigh. ]

Fuck you, Ampora. If you’d actually use your goddamn think pan for two seconds instead of just doing whatever the taintchafing fuck you want, then maybe you’d realize that we need to get information before blindly jumping into the clusterfuck that is this shithole!

Besides. The map says you’re going the wrong fucking way. Great navigational skills you have there, genius.

[Oops a snarl!]

Fuck your map and fuck whoewer you’re tryin’ to contact, we don’t need their help! Not to mention, if they’re the same as the ones in this tiny as fuck town we’re in, they’re HUMANS. Are you honestly goin’ to ask some fuckin’ sandsuckin’ HUMANS for help Kar? Thought you had more pride in bein’ a troll than that.

Guess I was wrong.

[ a hard clunk as the Gear hits the ground. sounds like someone threw it and there’s a rustle of fabric as Karkat is grabbing Eridan by the scarf. ]

If we’re here, fuckass, then the other members of our team could be too! Are they not worthy of trying to fucking contact either, grubtard? If I recall, you were the one practically begging me on your hands and fucking knees about traveling together in the first place.

[There’s a twin to that rustle of clothes as Eridan mirrors the gesture to Karkat’s own shirt, because fuck this, he’s not gonna let Karkat put his hands all over his clothes with some sort of retaliation!]

First off, get your grubby fuckin’ mits off my scarf! But second off, sure whatewer they MIGHT be here. And if they aren’t? We got a bunch a fuckin’ humans thinkin’ we’re some pathetic helpless species needin’ their help and guidance, fuck that and fuck you! I HARDLY did anythin’ so dramatic, dirtscrapper!

Eridan, you are the very essence of dramatic, you cape wearing douchebag. And so what if they’re humans? We’ve been fucking relying on humans ever since -

[ and he cuts himself off. ]

That shit was on, you know.

What? What was on?

[ in that moment Karkat lets Eridan go and picks up the Gear. have some noise while he waves it on. ]

It’s on you raving brinesucker!

Oh. [This is said very flatly with unamused realization.]

Well, turn it the fuck off, you stupid fuck!

What the hell are you calling me stupid for!? You’re the one that was so fucking insistent on me paying attention to you and your fin faced needs!

[ BUT HE TURNS IT OFF ANYWAY ]