022 ♋ Video

[usedshooshpap]

[ Karkat is literally surrounded when he flips on the Gear. poor guy is a little rattled, Pokemon kind of all over him. swablu, some dragons, his Espeon... but seriously. looks like he is about to hyperventilate over here. taking deep, slow breathes to help calm. ]

What the...

[ and then he loses it. ]

MIGHTY TAINT CHAFTING FUCK IS GOING ON!?!?



(( ooc note: it's been a whole year canon-wise for Karkat. he's going to be a little disoriented at first. ))

Comments

[panics]

I JUST MEANT YOU WERE REALLY GOOD FRIENDS! THAT'S ALL!!

[usedshooshpap]

[ SQUINTING!!!! ]

[panics]

I SWEAR!! I DIDN'T MEAN IT ANY OTHER WAY!! You're both guys!!

[usedshooshpap]

Gender is completely irrelevant to me, you know.

[panics]

... A-and that's okay too if you like other guys!!

[usedshooshpap]

IT SHOULD BE BECAUSE I STILL DON'T GET HOW THAT'S A THING, THIS HOMOSEXUALITY THING!!!

[panics]

A-AH! Don't say it sound loudly!!

[usedshooshpap]

Don't say what!?

[panics]

You know what! It's really embarassing!!

[usedshooshpap]

What... Are you telling me you're...

Homophobic?

[panics]

...No! I'm not! I just don't- I don't like talking about... anything like that...

[I.E. relationships in general. He can't even admit to himself he likes someone, he gets too nervous.

remind you of any brownbloods, no, maybe?]

[usedshooshpap]

...

Pussy.

[panics]

[ ... Well, he's just going to sit here and blush and not deny anything.]

[usedshooshpap]

Relationships are vital to developing good or bad social interactions, you know. I mean, shit man, you have to grow a pair of shame globes at some point here.

Humans are so stupidly slow at this. Trolls start filling up their quadrants at like ten to eleven years old.

[panics]

Ten?! Isn't that kind of ... young??

[usedshooshpap]

No? You sort of need relatively stable quadrants by the time you're eight or nine sweeps... Which is... about 17-19 years?

[panics]

[What are quadrants.]

That's still seven more years to find someone! And even then, that's pushing it! Some people don't get married until they're thirty, you know!

[People like him.]

[usedshooshpap]

It's fuck or die on Alternia, genius. Failure to provide genetic material to the drones when you reach adulthood is a one way ticket to the culling fields.

And with how trolls operate? You need those three to four sweeps to find someone.

[panics]

[It's one thing to say 'fuck' on a regular basis with no actual meaning to it.

It's another to use it to imply sex, and then keep talking about it.

More lack of response, but he is an untold shade of red.]

[usedshooshpap]

[ oh... oh no, boy. oh no for you. Karkat GRINS. ]

What? The thought of bulges and nooks terrify you into silence?

[panics]

[

Okay now he's less terrified and more confused, what the fuck are bulges and nooks.]

Uh.

[usedshooshpap]

Don't know the human equivalent and personally? I don't care to.

[panics]

... I think that's enough of talking to you today.

[usedshooshpap]

Back to my original point: pussy.

[panics]

THEY'RE JUST NOT THINGS I LIKE TO HAVE CASUAL CONVERSATION ABOUT, IS THAT SO BAD??