Knight of Blood

044 ♋ Video/Action ♋ 4th Wall

Sat, 01 Jun 2013 03:44:43 GMT

[ video has Karkat, in full troll skin kinda fussing with his nails. claws. whatever. in yellow Prospit pajamas. ]

Kanaya already said something, so I'm not going to repeat that shit pointlessly. I don't care how this happened. All I know is that I am very, very fucking thankful for it. I am hoping that it will stay that way.

It's not that I'm apposed to being soft and squishy. I just don't feel right in my own goddamn skin. This? This is much more natural.

[ doesn't look very scary with that Joltik perched on his shoulder though. ]

Last time I had this outfit an entire fucking moon blew up...

[ Alternatively ]

[ A) maybe you're just traveling along a route. maybe you're walking in town. suddenly there is this little guy attached to your pant leg. possibly eating it. maybe just chittering and climbing higher and higher.

B) it's a bird, it's a plane! no, likely it's just Karkat. goodhood and all. enjoying flight because he NEVER gets to fly. it's a sore spot. a big, giant sore spot.]

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043 ♋ Voice

Wed, 29 May 2013 22:05:04 GMT

( Private to Travel Party )

So I'm on my last badge. After this both Johto and Kanto will have been crushed under the fearsome wrath that is one Karkat Vantas and his victorious team of battle hardened beasts.

...What now? I mean what the fuck do you do after that massive undertaking has finally been cleared away? The Elite Four is still not an option, I know. Yeah, sure, I have some little beasts that need to be trained. But what is there really left to do?

I've just woken up from spending two whole goddamn years shooting the metaphorical breeze with ( if that's even how the saying goes - fuck if I know ) one red clad asshole and the Mayor. Not that it's been a bad experience, but I'm so done with sitting around with my nubs shoved up my waste chute.

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042 ♋ Voice

Sun, 31 Mar 2013 17:33:25 GMT

It's about goddamn time that the rumored Elite Four show their bulgesucking faces. I don't know how any of you that have been here for two years or more have been able to bear hearing about them but not actually know if they exist or not.

I'm hoping that it is some sort of sign that their challenges will be opening up soon, but I'm not going to hold my breath until my face turns all blue and blotchy. Fuck, I wouldn't even be surprised if it was just a ploy to get us there...

Seriously though... Has anyone even witnessed these guys walking around at all? Have they made even one single appearance? At all? I know I sure as hell haven't seen one of these assholes parading around the towns I tend to dwell in for a perigee at a time. How the fuck are we even going to know what they look like, if everyone is wearing a god awful mask?

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041 ♋ Video

Wed, 13 Mar 2013 22:58:58 GMT

After being able to finally manage the blind dragon, I get blessed with another gift through his evolution... I thought I was mentally prepared for the twin heads, but the goddamn beast is now nipping at itself.

[ he pans the camera to his Zweilous. sure enough, the two heads are snapping at each other. not at all playful like either. ]

It's like every thing has to be this big fucking competition between them. Last night the thing got sick because one head just had to try to out eat the other...

Any advice at this point would be good advice as I'm about to lose my shit over this juvenile behavior.

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♋ Breeder Con Eggs

Sun, 10 Feb 2013 22:03:56 GMT

( egggs~ )

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040 ♋ Text

Sun, 10 Feb 2013 02:03:00 GMT

TO THOSE THAT IT MAY CONCERN:
GAMZEE ISN'T AROUND ANY LONGER.
I'M SURE THAT THERE ARE THOSE THAT ARE AWARE OF THIS FACT ALREADY
BUT I FIGURED THAT JUST IN CASE THERE WAS SOMEONE UNAWARE THAT THEY SHOULD BE MADE
UH
AWARE, YEAH.
IN OTHER, MORE RELEVANT NEWS, I KNOW I SAID I WASN'T GOING TO LEAVE THE KANTO AREA UNTIL I GET THE REST OF MY BADGES.
I LIED.
BECAUSE OF A PARTICULAR BROAD, WHO WILL REMAIN NAMELESS, I HAVE BEEN COERCED INTO ATTENDING THIS BREEDING FESTIVAL THING.
THIS MEANS THAT IF ANYONE IS IN GOLDENROD THAT I CAN TOLERATE FOR MORE THAN AN HOUR THAT MIGHT WANT TO DO SOME CATCHING UP
I'LL BE THERE ON THE TWELFTH.
SPEAKING OF BREEDING, I HAVE A SHINY HAXORUS AND MIGHT BE INTERESTED IN EGGS FROM HIM.
UNFORTUNATELY, I AM A TRAINER SO YOU SEE THE PROBLEM THERE.
IF INTERESTED, GIVE ME A CALL.

OH FUCK, I COMPLETELY FORGOT TEREZI CAN'T READ TEXT.
ONE OF YOU ASSHOLES BETTER READ THIS TO HER, GOT THAT?

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039 ♋ Voice

Sat, 02 Feb 2013 04:21:53 GMT

Oh my god... How can anyone want to stick around one place for longer than a few weeks when there's so much shit to get done? I've been settled in Vermillion for only about three weeks and I am already going absolutely shithive maggots. Maybe the best idea is to just blaze through those last few badges, I don't know. What I do know is that one way or another, I am getting the merry fuck on my way. Screw waiting for the weather warm up.

I think my Pichu is feeling it too because he's kind of sparking here and there. Is that normal? Like, my Ampharos when she was a Mareep had this problem, but what the shit do I do to avoid getting shocked this time around? It's not like I can just take care when brushing him! That and he thinks every damn thing is funny at the moment and it just sets him off! Right now it's a never ending spiral of shocking, what I think is giggling, and more shocking. Just make it stop, oh my god.

[ as if on cue, a little Pichu can be heard chiming in and an aggravated huff from a Zangoose. Karkat... he just groans. sighs... ]

Unrelated to all of the globetickling bulgehumps out there and my own trainer problems - which is to say that this message is only for those of my particular joint universes - where the blithering fuck is everyone? I just met up with Eridan a few days ago, but what about everyone else?

( Private to Rose )

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038 ♋ Video

Mon, 07 Jan 2013 15:53:33 GMT

( Private to Lust )

When John wakes up, I am going to thank him for those earplugs. Do you know how fucking peaceful it was riding the train this time around? Maybe that's because a certain someone wasn't trying to start shit every time he batted an eyelash. He's your problem now, Megido.

Now. If I get one more fucking thing that has a Krabby on it, I swear that I will gouge the senders eyes out with my Alakazam's ( or really Vriska's, I guess ) spoons. Yes, haha. I'm a Cancer. Haha, Krabby and crabs. Yes, we all get the goddamn joke. However, let's take a moment to really examine that.

[ Karkat kind of eases the camera over to his Crawdaunt. ]

THIS is probably closer to what my Lusus looks like. He wasn't some scuttling little beast.

Moving on...

How the fuck do you raise a blind Pokémon? He just keeps biting at everything!

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037 ♋ Voice

Thu, 27 Dec 2012 00:51:10 GMT

Hopefully everyone is done wallowing in shame and embarrassment from that party enough for me to say that if I see mistletoe next year, I will fucking burn the place to the ground. Also, the adult Lalonde is not allowed to add her special "touch" to anything that might go into the bile sacks at any group function. Not that I don't appreciate the sentiment, but the end result was excruciating to watch.

Now that the official business is over, I've got a dilemma here. Obviously the first of the week, I'm going back towards Kanto. Big surprise, I know. What is surprising is that I don't know what I want to do. There are still four badges for me to get, but the question is... Do I just stay in Vermillion or Fuchsia until more tolerable traveling weather is in sight or just keep going? I'm a little on the fence because it's fucking cold and I hate traveling in it.

( [ Locked to Kanaya )

Oh, right. The Deino hatched yesterday. What the fuck is with these hyperactive hatchlings I've got recently?

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036 ♋ Voice

Fri, 21 Dec 2012 02:24:36 GMT

I FUCKING KNEW THAT THE UNIVERSE CAN'T HANDLE ALL OF THESE GODDAMN STRIDERS!

I TOLD YOU SO, DIRK STRIDER!

THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS!

(( ooc: Christmas gift list is now complete! ))

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♋ OOC - Christmas 2012 list COMPLETE

Fri, 14 Dec 2012 18:23:17 GMT

( Rikku, Astrid, Riku, Ventus, Vanitas, Cheria, Aidou, Kimblee, Larry, Nanao, and Winry )

( Castmates ).

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035 ♋ Video [ Action for Goldenrod ]

Sun, 09 Dec 2012 05:59:44 GMT

You asshole! Son of a god damned fucking jackass, we had a deal! I wouldn't punch you, and YOU WOULDN'T PULL THIS SHIT!

[ the voice isn't Karkat's, since the screen shows a very pissed off Vanitas being held in Dartanian's mouth. as the screen moves with the Charizard, Karkat comes into view, leaning against Andie. said Tyranitar and Karkat don't even look bothered by the fact this is going on.

what does cause a curious glance is the smug look Dart has when dropping Vanitas at Andie's feet.

Vanitas doesn't like that very much. ]

If you're going to pick me up and hold me with your teeth, at least set me down better than that! Idiot!

[ not that Dart cares. he takes off to the air and the camera follows. Dart is flying circles in the night sky, throwing around fire like a private firework show. pretty, right?

focusing back on the trio left behind, all are watching while Karkat hands his Tyranitar a treat. ]

I think he likes you.

[ Andie snorts and she seems to be more interested in that treat than Dart's mating call. ]

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034 ♋ Video/Action ♋ 4th Wall

Sat, 24 Nov 2012 21:02:44 GMT

[ sure is stretching out that cape of his, getting a good look at it and flashing it around. cape magnet, this troll is. As such, Karkat can be found in Ecruteak for the duration of the event. probably doing some shopping with this loyal Pokémon at his heels. just because he is a troll again doesn't mean he is going to change his routine, nope. ]

This has got to be some fucking joke. Who ever is behind this, I want to first punch them in the face until I have acquired enough teeth that would make the humans' Tooth Fairy jealous before metaphorically kissing the ground that they walk on.

I was going to come here anyway, so I guess there's really no point in obtaining a ticket back to Saffron. Unless Rose is in dire need of another personal interaction. [ read: hug ]

Now I just got to wonder how the hell we're going to get screwed over for this...

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033 ♋ Text

Thu, 15 Nov 2012 18:39:39 GMT

( Filtered to Eridan )

TWO THINGS THAT I'M GOING TO THROW UP FOR POTENTIAL AID.
IN OTHER WORDS, I SORT OF NEED A FEW VOLUNTEERS.
THE FIRST MATTER IS THAT I WANT TO EVOLVE MY HAUNTER, BUT I REALIZE THAT NEEDS A TRADE.
SO IF ANY ONE OF YOU SHIT HEADS FEELS AMIABLE TO DO SO, CALL ME UP.
NOW THE SECOND ISSUE MIGHT BE CONTROVERSIAL, BUT THE TRUTH IS THAT I GIVE NO FUCKS AND IT ALREADY FEELS AS FUCKING AWKWARD AS A DEERLING'S FIRST STEPS.
MY BOX IS GETTING KIND OF FULL AND I NEED TO CLEAR SOME OF IT OUT.
THE PROBLEM IS THAT I KEEP GETTING BEASTS FROM DIFFERENT MORONS AS THEY LEAVE THIS ARMPIT UNIVERSE.
I'M LOOKING FOR PEOPLE TO TAKE THEM OFF OF MY HANDS BECAUSE I'M SURE THEY'LL DO SOMEONE SOME GOOD OUT THERE.
ONE IS A BLASTOISE AND THE OTHER IS A KINGLER.
THEY'RE BOTH PRETTY STRONG, IF YOU'RE FINE WITH LEVELS BETWEEN 50-67.
I ALREADY HAVE A WARTORTLE AND HAVING A CRAB IN MY ROSTER JUST
WELL LET'S JUST SAY OUT OF ALL OF THE BEASTS I COULD POTENTIALLY OWN, A GODDAMN CRAB IS NOT GOING TO BE ONE OF THEM.

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032 ♋ Video

Sat, 27 Oct 2012 02:44:05 GMT

[ Karkat is just sitting there in a chair, staring intently at the camera. scowling and not in a good mood at all. like that's any surprise, right?

on one side is Sara, his Mightyena. the other side is Leopold, the Espeon. ]

I'd like to see one of them fuckers even try to take me by surprise.

No one is getting the better of me.

[ yeap. super paranoid. ]

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031 ♋ Voice

Mon, 15 Oct 2012 16:11:00 GMT

Here's a question for all of you who like to answer such things. It's completely mundane and has no deep meaning, so don't fucking look for any. Just listen to the question, answer it, and move along without dwelling too much ( read: AT ALL ) on what's behind it. Because there's nothing. Got it? Okay, great.

Where is your favorite location in this shithole and why.

Now go.

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030 ♋ Text

Mon, 01 Oct 2012 04:18:27 GMT

ROSE HAD HER MEMO LAST NIGHT AND I GUESS NOW IT'S MY TURN.
THOUGH DON'T EXPECT FUN AND GAMES HERE.
IT'S JUST THE CONTINUED RAMBLINGS OF A TROLL KID THAT STILL IS STUCK IN PINK, FLESHY ATTIRE.
PROCEED AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION.
YOU HAVE BEEN FUCKING WARNED.

( cut for length and Karkat rambles about his thoughts on being here for a year )

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029 ♋ Text

Thu, 13 Sep 2012 19:02:19 GMT

ALL RIGHT. NOW THAT WE HAVE FINALLY ARRIVED IN THIS LITTLE BACKWATER TOWN
THERE'S SOME BUSINESS TO DISCUSS.
IN OTHER WORDS, I HAVE SOME EGGS THAT ARE FOR SALE.
IN THE PAST, THIS HAS BEEN FOR FREE.
HOWEVER, BECAUSE OF *REASONS* THIS TIME I CAN'T REALLY AFFORD TO DO THAT.
WE HAVE SHINX, AXEW, BAGON, PURRLOIN, TWO DIFFERENT SETS OF SWABLU EGGS, LAPRAS, FEEBAS, BLITZLE, GASTLY, RALTZ, GROWLITHE, POOCHYENA, AND DRATINI.
MAKE AN INQUIRY ABOUT ONE AND I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I CAN AND THE PRICE THAT I WILL BE CHARGING.
SOME OF THESE SHITTY BEASTS ARE GOING TO BE A LITTLE COSTLY.
WHAT CAN I SAY? YOU CAN'T GET NEW BATTLEMATES WITH A FUCK TON OF MOVES AND NOT EXPECT TO PAY A *LITTLE* BIT FOR IT, RIGHT.
RIGHT
ANYWAY, THAT'S WHAT WE GOT.
UNFORTUNATELY, IF YOU'RE IN JOHTO, I CAN ONLY SEND THEM TO YOUR PC.
IF YOU'RE IN KANTO, I CAN MAKE AN EXCEPTION IF NO ONE IS ADVERSE TO HAVING A GIANT BAT DELIVER.
YEAH, I THINK THAT'S ALL I GOT.

(( ooc: there are still some left ))

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028 ♋ Video

Sat, 08 Sep 2012 22:14:03 GMT

This is a little late coming, but I've had shit to do before I could sit here and brag.

[ which means, of course, Karkat is showing off his shiny badge. ]

One elite battle down, six more to fucking go. And I will do it.

I know there are people out there that have completed both the Johto and the Kanto circuit, so I've got to know: what comes after? Am I going to be bored out of my goddamn think pan or should I just be content to plant my ass somewhere?

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027 ♋ Voice

Sun, 19 Aug 2012 21:56:52 GMT

[ hello people of Johto an Kanto. are you ready for Vanitas and Sollux fighting? welp. sure hope you are because that's exactly what's going on here. ]

Quit taking up all the space.

I'm taking up all the space? You're the one with hair bigger than your head, asshole.

I'd cut it but can't have knives on a train, idiot. Now move over.

Like you couldn't have done it before we left? Newsflash: when you're sitting in a train, not everyone has room for their luscious flowing locks. [He's not moving an inch.]

[ Karkat groans... and the two continue to bicker in the background. ]

Oh my fucking god they will not stop! I knew this was such a bad idea. I should have gotten a different seat. One lodged all the way in the back so that they can continue to romance each other in the blackest of dances. I mean seriously, holy shit! People are staring at us, but no! Oh no. They have to prattle on and argue about goddamn hair of all things!

[ in the background: I don't really care how long it gets; quit your whining and find something better to bitch about other than my hair. ]

It's. Fucking. Hair!

[ also in the background: It's also a national fucking emergency. Look at it. You could hide a bomb in that thing. ]

Someone help me. I don't think I can take another three hours of this asinine garbage. If I am forced to sit through this festering cesspool of petty fights, I might be two travel partners down...

Shut it, I don't want some officials thinking that could be true and putting their nasty hands all over my head!

Pokémon Center got blown up? Ok. Freaky magic powers? Sure. But it could go off at any minute and we could destroy miles of valuable Johto countryside. [ ... ] Look, I do not feel safe with your hair around, ok.

SOMEONE FUCKING PLEASE!

(( ooc: gray is Karkat, red is Vanitas, and ~~icky~~ beautiful yellow is Sollux. ))

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026 ♋ Video

Fri, 03 Aug 2012 00:58:16 GMT

[ when the feed clicks on, it only shows one thing. Ventus and Vanitas propped up. in bed. sleeping. ]

Since this place is getting new blood in all of the fucking time, I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to present a lesson about the mechanics of how this stupid place works.

Behold upon your screen, if you dare, at the deceptively innocent faces of these two bulgesuckers. They have fallen into a sleep that they cannot be roused from.

[ just to demonstrate this fact... Karkat has a squirt gun and is shooting Vanitas and Ventus in the face with it. nope. not even stirring. ]

Get used to it. It could very well happen to you. They could be experiencing memories from their home world.

Either way, Ventus and Vanitas are out of commission for fuck knows how long and up to a week, maybe. If you need them, leave a goddamn message on their Gears since I am no fucking message boy.

That's it. Move along with your worthless lives now.

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025 ♋ Video

Tue, 24 Jul 2012 22:23:19 GMT

Once some of you fresh meat are finished freaking the fuck out and actually work towards getting settled into your environments...

Here is a golden opportunity, so open your auricular sponge clots and listen up. I have some eggs that I need to get rid of. Twenty fucking seven eggs, in fact. There's a variety and what doesn't get taken by some happy new partner slash owner gets set free into the wilds to defend itself.

[ not really. he'll ship the remaining eggs to the day care or something. there's still plenty there to snatch up! ]

So don't let them get eaten by wild Sneasels! Just fucking take them! One of the Axew eggs is for the oddly named human Hiccup.

Otherwise? I've got nothing. I do want to ask if anyone has any leads on what the fuck happened the last week, but I'm doubtful that anyone really knows who was behind that shit.

I wonder how long these effects are going to stick around.

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024 ♋ Voice

Tue, 10 Jul 2012 15:58:24 GMT

I'M GOING TO KICK YOUR ASS, VANITAS! THAT WAS A DIRTY ROTTEN FUCKING TRICK AND YOU BETTER BE READY TO PAY SOME FORM OF RESTITUTION FOR YOUR CRIMES! AND DON'T THINK THAT FOR A MINUTE YOU'RE GETTING OFF EITHER, SOLLUX MOTHERFUCKING CAPTOR! YOU ARE ALSO BEING HELD RESPONSIBLE!

[ then he coughs from the shouting and groans. ]

As if this week couldn't even get remotely worse at this point. You know... Every time I think 'hey, looks like life is finally giving me a decent deal,' I get fucked over in some way. Just throw me down on a table, Life. Have it your way because every turn I make, that's just what you're going to do anyway!

[ huff puff huff puff ]

Is it so fucking wrong to ask for one thing to go right? Just one?

( Filtered to Rose )

( Filtered to Eridan )

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023 ♋ Text

Mon, 25 Jun 2012 22:45:21 GMT

HEY SHITLICKERS, EYES OVER HERE FOR ABOUT TWO SECONDS.
I HAVE SOMETHING OF THE UTMOST IMPORTANCE TO ASK ABOUT.
I'LL GET TO THAT IN A MINUTE.
FIRST, REST ASSURED THAT I AM STILL FINE, GODDAMMIT.
WHERE ALL THIS CONCERN CAME FROM, IN REGARDS TO MY LAST RECORDING, I HAVE NO CLUE
BUT DON'T GET YOUR HORNS ALL LOCKED UP AND TWISTED OVER IT.
IT'S NOT LIKE I WAS HAVING A PANIC ATTACK OR ANYTHING, HOLY SHIT.
SECOND, I AM DONE WITH THE GYM CHALLENGE HERE IN JOHTO.
KANTO IS NEXT ON THE LIST SINCE I *WILL* GET ALL SIXTEEN FUCKING BADGES AND NO ONE IS GOING TO STOP ME.
FINALLY, THE MOST IMPORTANT PART:
WHEN IS THE NEXT EQUINOX?

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022 ♋ Video

Tue, 19 Jun 2012 02:56:36 GMT

[ Karkat is literally surrounded when he flips on the Gear. poor guy is a little rattled, Pokemon kind of all over him. swablu, some dragons, his Espeon... but seriously. looks like he is about to hyperventilate over here. taking deep, slow breathes to help calm. ]

What the...

[ and then he loses it. ]

MIGHTY TAINT CHAFTING FUCK IS GOING ON!?!?

(( ooc note: it's been a whole year canon-wise for Karkat. he's going to be a little disoriented at first. ))

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